Tacky. . .

but read on if you need a giggle.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball?
~Juan on Juan

What is a Yankee?
~The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

What do you see when the Pillsbury Dough Boy bends over?
~Doughnuts?

Why is air a lot like sex?
~Because it’s no big deal unless you’re not getting any

What’s the difference between a girlfriend and wife?
~45 lbs

What’s the difference between a boyfriend and husband?
~45 minutes

What’s the fastest way to a man’s heart?
~Through his chest with a sharp knife.

Why do men want to marry virgins?
~They can’t stand criticism.

Why is it so hard for women to find men that are sensitive, caring, and good-looking?
~Because those men already have boyfriends.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
~The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
~Mace will do that to you.

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
~Breasts don’t have eyes.

Why do drivers’ education classes in Redneck schools use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays?
~Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other?
~A speech impediment.

What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
~They’re hiring.

What’s the difference between a southern zoo and a northern zoo?
~A southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage along with… “a recipe”.

How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say the F word?
~Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to yell *BINGO*!

What’s the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
~A northern fairytale begins “Once upon a time..” A southern fairytale begins “Y’all ain’t gonna believe this shit…”

Why is there no Disneyland in China ?
~No one’s tall enough to go on the good rides