OK, it’s time I realize that I am an erotica writer. I gave the romance thing a shot, and I do love those stories, but I’ve come to the recent conclusion that the erotica comes more natural to me. Maybe It’s because I’m single, and I’ve never been in love, therefore sometimes writing about love makes me feel lost. Maybe it’s because I think sex is a lot more common these days than love, and that people can learn a lot of very mportant things about each other through a sexual relationship.
Then again, maybe it’s just because I’m a bit of a pervert. 
Whatever the reason, I’ve decided to let myself go with it.
What brought this on? BOUND, the erotica novel that I’m in the middle of writing for Berkley. I’ve had a couple of cp’s and friends read it, and I got a lot of negative comments about the way Joe treats Katie. Part of me thought it might be because people were expecting a romance, and this is not a romance. I admit, I’m pretty anxious about this particular novel, for a couple reasons. One, it’s for Berkley, a publisher I’d really like to establish a solid career with. And two, it’s my first single title length. (Longer and more in depth than anythign I’ve ever written)
Two very good frineds, and fellow writers, Beth, and JJ gave me a dual butt kicking the other night. A much needed one. They told me, it was my story, the editor saw something in it they liked, and to follow the story in my head. I know this. I mean, we all know that we are the writers, that we create these characters and these stories. And that after we create them, we need to listen to them. We need to tell their story, and not force the story to fit what we think it should be. But somewhere along the way, I lost track of that, and then I started to loose track of the story.
Insecurity sucks! It’s a black hole.
I had an objective reader, someone who loves erotica and is familiar with it but isn’t a writer, read what I had so far. Her feedback was very valuable. It pinpointed one very valuable thing that was missing. A small thing, but a valuable thing. Thank you, Amber!
The funny thing is, what Amber noticed, was the same thing the others noticed, she just said it in a way that made it click right in my head. Now with a clear vision of what I need to do that blends with what I want to do, (and what Katie and Joe want), and the security that what I can do (from a loving butt kicking), I can move on.
So, for now, the insecurity is gone, and I’m gearing up to let the kinkiness go. Y’all like a little kink with a good story right? :P
aww, hon. Glad you found your way, and the conviction of your voice. :)
by Jaq October 19th, 2005 at 4:36 pmWe love that you are a pervert. :)
by Eve October 19th, 2005 at 6:30 pmYou just let me know when I need to shine up my cowboy boots again. I love a good butt whooping. :rolleyes:
by Beth October 19th, 2005 at 6:39 pmNow as to BOUND, it is good and hot and raunchy and I personally love it!
You are who you are and embrace it. Erotica ahoy! :)
I think that is cool. I still think of myself as an erotic romance writer, but damned if some of my stuff really isn’t closer to erotica than I’d like to admit. Mainly the quickies and novellas. Not a lot of time to establish a good relationship. But we all gotta do what we love best!
by Cheyenne McCray October 19th, 2005 at 9:43 pmHey Sasha,
Don’t let the negativity/insecurity black hole eat you up. I often find myself drawn to erotica even though I am married and supposed to be living ‘happily ever after’. Why is that for me? Well, I personally feel that romance is escapist bullshit. There is no happily ever after. There’s only, ‘work your ass off to make something real with a person you love and sometimes hate and then love all over again’. Marriage is hard work, not some romantic fantasy and I hate the romance novel ‘now everythings fabulous because we’re going to get married’ attitude. Sure I still write romance, but that’s why I like to play up the humor because I know my hero and heroine are going to need a good sense of humor to keep something real going after the intial glow is off the rose…or the marble…or whatever that analogy is. Lol!. Anyway, hugs to you and def. go with your gut. My gut has saved my butt more times than I can count. Stacey I.
by Stacey I./Anna E. October 19th, 2005 at 10:27 pmYou know, I was just whining to Larissa today about being so damned insecure about a story I was editing - it was all wrong, I didn’t like it but I couldn’t figure out what the problem was. Her advice: Why did you start writing that book in the first place? Find what you loved about that book in the first place and try and get that feeling back.
So rational. And right. But don’t tell her, because she’ll think she’s all smart and stuff…
by Steph T. October 19th, 2005 at 11:27 pmAll right Sasha!!!
You should always follow your heart when it comes to your books. Not everything everyone says is true for you and your work.
Beth and JJ were right to kick your butt!! I"m just sorry I contributed to the doubt…
Bad Vivi!! Bad Vivi!!!
by Vivi Anna October 19th, 2005 at 11:46 pmSo glad to hear that you’ve conquered those demons and you’re back on track and feeling great about the book!
And hell yes about the bit of kink with a good story! Bring it on! :D
by wendywoo October 20th, 2005 at 2:13 amBeing riddled with doubts about what I’m writing is the usual state of affairs for me, so I relate to how you’ve been feeling, Sasha! I have to go with the flow of what feels right about a story as I write. Adjustments can come later but if I feel I have to shoehorn it into place as I go it’s not good for me or the story. Hope it’s running much smoother for you now.
by Saskia October 20th, 2005 at 3:00 amBegone, crows of doubt! Leave Sasha alone while she works. And I had no idea reading kink would be so, er, intriguing! :satisfied:
by Sela October 20th, 2005 at 6:28 amRaising coffee mug in your honor. It’s important to discover the type of writer you are. It doesn’t mean that you can’t change later, but for now you’ve stopped trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. (Pardon the cliche.) I’m sure it’s a huge relief and a tremendous weight off your shoulders. :-)
by Jordan October 20th, 2005 at 11:43 amStacey!! You are so right! I have many friends that are always telling me marriage is work!
ANd they also are the ones who tel me to follow my gut, just like you did ! Thanks, chica!
Steph~ I’m telling Larissa! :P Kidding. Man that doubt thing is a bitch. But together, we’ll get past it. :)
Vivi~ No! You were honest, and didn’t say anything the others didn’t. You all just said it in differnt ways, and it took a certain way to make it click in my head. No worries, Girl!
by Sasha October 20th, 2005 at 12:33 pm:hehe: You write what feels best for you…right now I am working on something a little longer then my usual Quickies, a bit tuff going.
by Dianna October 20th, 2005 at 2:22 pmOne of my favorite romance stories is Bridges of Madison County, in the end the lover go back to their lives, I wonder sometimes if I could get away with a secret week with an Clint Eastwood kinda guy… :hehe: :hehe:
Inspired by a new hot guy can be fun writing lol…I wrote some of the hottest scenes of my life right after meeting Diego lol That new,can’t keep your hands off each other, thing is sizzling… BUT from the way you write great sex, wondering who inspired you :hehe: ….? LOL
by Lisa Renee Jones October 20th, 2005 at 10:51 pmInspired by a new hot guy can be fun writing lol…I wrote some of the hottest scenes of my life right after meeting Diego lol That new,can’t keep your hands off each other, thing is sizzling… BUT from the way you write great sex, wondering who inspired you :hehe: ….? LOL
by Lisa Renee Jones October 20th, 2005 at 10:51 pmPorn peddler…hahaha.
by Os October 21st, 2005 at 11:24 amRomance is just a cleaner form of the word erotica. At least in my world
Well, we all know your world is a wbit off, Os. Erotica and Romance aren’t the same. And Porn is even more different. :)
by Sasha October 21st, 2005 at 11:33 amPorn/Erotica/Romance - I agree with you that sometimes (okay many times - make that most times) I get a book & I just scan or skip the rest of the story entirely & get to "the good stuff". I get frustrated with the "happily ever after" stuff because I think I agree w/ Stacey that marriage or any real relationship is more about work than all the hearts & flowers. I have to say Sasha, I am learning about writing erotica from reading your stuff & reading your blog. Still working on letting down the internal barriers & just letting stuff go without censorship, though. Good to know others struggle with same. Keep it up, girl! :satisfied:
by Scorpio57 October 21st, 2005 at 12:20 pmGlad you sorted it out! YAY!
by Amber October 21st, 2005 at 2:49 pmI think the best romances aren’t the ones that end in sickly sweet "ain’t life perfect" scenarios. They’re the ones that end with a couple who are willing to work together, even when life gets tough. But love isn’t all a slog of work — there are some wonderful, sweet, beautiful moments and I’m happy to see a story end on one of those.
by Sela October 21st, 2005 at 3:48 pmDude, you are seriously going through some of the same stuff I’m working through right now.
I’ve found a good fit for my voice and my stories, but it’s cost me in ways I hadn’t expected. Going with your gut and being true to yourself isn’t without its price, but it’s worth it to stop forcing yourself into some prefabricated slot where you never fit in the first place.
JJ and Beth were right. It *is* your story. You probably feel that you have a lot riding on this one, and it’s making you freeze up. Remember that you’re the driving impetus behind the story, and it’s the spark of life that only *you* can add that caught an editor’s attention in the first place. Then set that spark free.
by Alecia Monaco October 22nd, 2005 at 8:51 amI like a little kink in my stories, and in my life. Go for it hon. You never know when it all might actually happen! It did with me!
Kisses!
Mrs 26
by Mrs 26 October 22nd, 2005 at 8:38 pmI myself am trying to find out whether i’m more romance or romantica with my writing style. But I have to admit smut it more fun to write!
by Charlie October 24th, 2005 at 7:11 pm